Positive Living

If Humility teaches us to quiet the ego, Loyalty teaches us to remain faithful to what is worthy, and Courage teaches us to face life even when we are afraid, then Positive Living teaches us how to carry ourselves through the circumstances of everyday life. It is not simply about thinking happy thoughts or pretending that everything is wonderful. It is a way of meeting life with an open heart rather than allowing fear, anger, disappointment and negativity to become the masters of our consciousness.

Life will not always give us what we want.

There will be loss. There will be illness. There will be financial difficulties, broken relationships, disappointments, misunderstandings and times when we simply cannot see a way forward. There will be mornings when we wake up and wonder how we are going to get through the day.

Positive Living does not deny any of this.

It asks us what we are going to do with it.

One of the greatest obstacles to peace is the habit of becoming a victim of our circumstances. Something happens to us and we begin telling ourselves a story about why life is unfair, why someone else is responsible, why we can never get ahead, why we are destined to suffer. The story may contain some truth. People do hurt us. Circumstances can be unjust. Terrible things can happen to good people.

But there is a difference between acknowledging what has happened and allowing what has happened to become our identity.

The victim says, "This is what life has done to me."

The spiritual seeker eventually asks, "What can I learn from this, and what can I do from here?"

That question creates movement.

It returns some of our power.

We cannot always control what happens to us, but we can work on how we meet what happens to us. We can choose whether to spend our days feeding resentment or searching for understanding. We can choose whether to remain trapped in fear or begin looking for a solution. We can choose whether to keep staring at the closed door or turn around and see if another door has opened.

This is not always easy.

But it is powerful.

Positive Living begins with the understanding that our attention is energy. What we continually think about, talk about and emotionally feed becomes increasingly powerful in our lives. If we spend our days talking about everything that is wrong, everyone who has disappointed us, every fear about the future and every grievance from the past, we strengthen those patterns within ourselves.

This does not mean that our thoughts magically control every event in the universe. Life is far more mysterious than that. We cannot simply think ourselves into perfect health, unlimited wealth or a life without tragedy. But our thoughts influence our choices, our behavior, our relationships, our stress, our habits and the way we interpret the world around us. Over time, those things shape the life we experience.

We are constantly sowing something.

Every thought is a seed.

Every word is a seed.

Every action is a seed.

Every relationship is a seed.

If we continually sow fear, resentment, suspicion and hatred, we should not be surprised when our inner world becomes filled with those things.

If we sow kindness, forgiveness, gratitude, courage and love, something different begins to grow.

This is why Positive Living is not merely a cheerful personality trait.

It is a spiritual discipline.

It is a conscious decision about what we are going to cultivate within ourselves.

There is tremendous power in learning not to dwell on troubling circumstances. This does not mean ignoring problems. It means refusing to give them more of our consciousness than they deserve.

We can think about something long enough to understand it, make a decision and take action. After that, we may need to let it go. But the mind often wants to return to the same wound over and over again. It replays the conversation. It imagines what we should have said. It remembers what someone did to us years ago. It predicts everything that might go wrong tomorrow.

The event may have lasted ten minutes.

The mind can keep it alive for ten years.

Positive Living teaches us to interrupt that cycle.

"Is there something I can do?"

If yes, do it.

"Is there something I need to learn?"

If yes, learn it.

"Is there something I need to forgive?"

If yes, begin forgiving.

"Is there something I cannot change?"

If yes, begin accepting it.

Acceptance is one of the great spiritual powers.

Acceptance does not mean approval.

It does not mean that we say something harmful is good, that injustice does not matter, or that we stop trying to improve our lives. Acceptance simply means that we stop fighting with the fact that something has already happened.

The past is not waiting for our permission to have occurred.

Once we accept reality, we can begin working with it.

And that is where solutions often appear.

Sometimes the solution is an action.

Sometimes it is a change in attitude.

Sometimes it is forgiveness.

Sometimes it is a boundary.

Sometimes it is leaving.

Sometimes it is staying.

Sometimes there is no immediate solution, and the lesson is simply learning how to remain peaceful while moving through something we cannot yet change.

This is where Positive Living connects with Courage.

Courage taught us that we can face difficult things without surrendering to fear.

Positive Living teaches us that we can face those same difficulties without surrendering our peace.

There is an enormous difference between having trouble and becoming trouble.

We can have a difficult day without becoming a difficult person.

We can experience pain without becoming defined by pain.

We can experience fear without becoming a person who lives entirely through fear.

We can experience disappointment without becoming disappointed with life itself.

The spiritual path asks us to keep the heart open.

That may be one of the hardest practices of all.

When life hurts us, the natural reaction is often to close down. We become suspicious. We stop trusting. We expect the worst. We build walls and call those walls wisdom.

Sometimes they are not wisdom.

Sometimes they are simply old wounds protecting themselves.

Positive Living is the courage to remain open to the possibility that something good can still happen.

Even when there is little evidence.

That is where faith enters.

Not blind faith that denies reality, but faith in the possibility of goodness.

Faith that people can change.

Faith that we can change.

Faith that tomorrow can contain something that today does not.

Faith that Love is stronger than hatred.

Faith that forgiveness can release us from the past.

Faith that the Divine is present even when we cannot understand what is happening.

There will be times when life looks terrible.

Those are precisely the times when we must become careful about what we feed within ourselves.

Fear feeds fear.

Doubt feeds doubt.

Hatred feeds hatred.

Love feeds Love.

If everything around us appears to be falling apart, we do not have to add our own consciousness to the destruction.

We can breathe.

We can become quiet.

We can pray.

We can meditate.

We can take the next step.

We can look for the loving response.

We can ask, "What is the most constructive thing I can do right now?"

That question can become a spiritual lifeline.

Positive Living does not mean that we are always smiling. Some of the most positive people I have known have endured tremendous personal suffering. Their positivity was not superficial. It came from somewhere deeper. They had learned that joy is not dependent upon perfect circumstances.

Peace is an inner condition.

Joy is an inner possibility.

Love is an inner choice.

Circumstances influence us, but they do not have to completely define us.

This is especially important because the body and mind are connected. Our emotional life affects how we experience physical life, and chronic stress can have real effects on the body. Persistent anxiety and negativity can influence sleep, energy, blood pressure, muscle tension, appetite, concentration and many other aspects of health. A more positive and emotionally balanced outlook does not guarantee that we will never become sick, but healthy ways of coping with stress can support both mental and physical well-being.

This is another reason not to turn spirituality into blame.

If someone becomes ill, it is not helpful to tell them that they simply failed to think positively enough. Illness is complicated. Human beings are complicated. Genetics, environment, age, behavior, disease and countless other factors can affect health.

But even when we cannot control the condition of the body, we can work with the condition of the mind and spirit.

We can choose how much fear we will feed.

We can choose whether we will seek help.

We can choose whether we will remain connected to people who love us.

We can choose gratitude for what remains.

We can choose hope.

That choice has meaning.

The same principle applies to aging. We cannot stop time. We cannot hold onto our youth forever. We cannot control every change that comes to the body. But we can decide whether we will spend our remaining years fighting reality or learning how to live beautifully within it.

There is great spiritual wisdom in saying, "This is where I am."

Not, "This is where I wanted to be."

Not, "This is where everyone else thinks I should be."

But, "This is where I am. What can I do with this moment?"

That is Positive Living.

It brings us back to the present.

The ego loves yesterday and tomorrow. Yesterday gives it grievances. Tomorrow gives it fears.

The present gives it very little to hold onto.

In this moment, there is simply life.

Breathing.

Awareness.

Possibility.

The Divine.

Positive Living also means becoming careful about the company we keep and the energy we contribute. Every person affects the emotional atmosphere around them. We can walk into a room carrying tension, criticism and complaint, or we can bring kindness, humor, patience and encouragement.

We become part of the environment we complain about.

If we want a more loving world, we must become more loving within the world.

This is where the teaching of Oneness becomes practical.

If we are truly One, then our thoughts, words and actions are not isolated events. What we give to the world becomes part of the world.

When we sow Love, we contribute Love.

When we sow fear, we contribute fear.

When we forgive, we interrupt the cycle of resentment.

When we speak kindly, we may change another person's entire day.

When we encourage someone who has lost hope, we may give them enough strength to take another step.

We rarely know how far a single act of goodness travels.

That is why we should never underestimate the power of a positive life.

It may not make headlines.

It may never be rewarded.

Nobody may even know what we have done.

But the energy of goodness continues.

This is also why Positive Living is connected to Loyalty. We must become loyal to our own highest intentions. It is easy to decide one day that we are going to live peacefully and then abandon that commitment the next time someone upsets us.

The practice is to return.

Return to Love.

Return to patience.

Return to gratitude.

Return to forgiveness.

Return to the breath.

Return to the present.

Return to the Divine.

We will lose our way. Everyone does.

The spiritual life is not about never falling out of balance. It is about learning how to come back.

This is where Courage enters again.

Sometimes we must have the courage to stop listening to the people who constantly tell us how terrible everything is. Sometimes we must have the courage to change the conversations we participate in. Sometimes we must have the courage to stop feeding gossip, outrage and endless negativity.

We cannot control everything that enters the world, but we have some responsibility for what we invite into our own consciousness.

The modern world provides an endless stream of things to fear.

There will always be another crisis.

Another argument.

Another tragedy.

Another prediction of disaster.

Another reason to become angry.

We cannot consume all of it and remain peaceful.

At some point we have to turn away from the noise and return to our own inner life.

This does not mean becoming uninformed or indifferent to suffering. It means refusing to allow the world's suffering to destroy our ability to contribute something healing to it.

We need people who can remain calm in difficult times.

People who can think clearly when others are frightened.

People who can speak with kindness when others are shouting.

People who can look for solutions instead of simply identifying problems.

People who can believe in goodness when goodness seems invisible.

That is spiritual strength.

Positive Living is not weakness.

It is disciplined optimism.

It is the refusal to make fear the center of our existence.

It is the practice of looking for what can still be healed, what can still be learned, what can still be loved and what can still be created.

And sometimes, when we cannot change the circumstances at all, it is simply the decision to remain a loving human being while passing through them.

That may be enough.

Perhaps that is the deeper lesson.

We do not always choose the circumstances into which we are born or the events that enter our lives. But we participate in creating the consciousness with which we meet them.

Every morning gives us another opportunity to decide what we will sow.

Will we sow fear or Love?

Complaint or gratitude?

Resentment or forgiveness?

Separation or Oneness?

Hopelessness or possibility?

The choice may not change everything around us immediately.

But it changes something within us.

And what changes within us eventually changes what we bring to everything around us.

This is why Positive Living is a Power Virtue.

It is not about pretending that darkness does not exist.

It is about refusing to become darkness.

It is about carrying a small flame of Love even when the night is long.

It is about believing that goodness is still possible even when there is little evidence of it.

It is about facing reality without surrendering our spirit to reality.

Humility teaches us that we are not the center of the universe.

Loyalty teaches us what is worthy of our faithfulness.

Courage teaches us to face what frightens us.

Positive Living teaches us what kind of energy we will bring to the life we have been given.

And perhaps this is where the power of the first four virtues begins to come together.

We bow before something greater than ourselves.

We remain faithful to what is true.

We find the courage to live it.

And then, day after day, we choose the energy with which we meet the world.

We may not be able to control every wave that comes toward us.

But we can learn how to meet the wave.

We can learn how to breathe.

We can learn how to remain centered.

We can learn how to keep our hearts open.

And we can keep moving toward the Light.

Because life is not merely what happens to us.

Life is also what we bring to what happens.

And every day, consciously or unconsciously, we are planting seeds.

So let us plant Love.

Let us plant hope.

Let us plant kindness.

Let us plant forgiveness.

Let us plant courage.

Let us plant peace.

And let us trust that somewhere, somehow, those seeds will grow.